


Tears in heaven

by impala4maggie



Series: What could have been [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Crying Castiel, Dean Bears The Mark of Cain, Depressed Dean, Depressed Sam, Episode: s10e23 My Brother's Keeper, Gen, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Letters, Mark of Cain, Protective Dean Winchester, Protective Sam Winchester, Sad, Sad Dean Winchester, Sad Ending, Sad Sam, Season Finale, Season/Series 10, Self-Sacrifice, Suicidal Thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-16
Updated: 2015-04-16
Packaged: 2018-03-23 03:51:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3753448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/impala4maggie/pseuds/impala4maggie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An alterative ending of Supernatural season 10.<br/>The story: Dean will do what every it takes to protect Sam, even thought that might mean not ever seeing him again.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tears in heaven

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, this takes place after s10e17 and before s10e18.  
> Please excuse any errors.  
> Comments and kudos are welcome.
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own Supernatural.

_Beyond the door, there’s peace I’m sure, and I know there'll be no more tears in heaven._ \- Eric Clapton  
\--------------------------------------------------------

Dean wasn't a wise man, nor was he a rich man. He didn’t have any real ambition. His only goal in life was survival, not fame or fortune but simply being able to breathe another day. That’s how it has always been. However, his survival depended on the welfare of his brother. When Sam was suffering, then so was Dean. There simply was no life, no him without Sam. Dean swears that each time Sammy died; he held his breath until his brother was resurrected.

He never told Sam this but that year he thought Sammy was dead, was worst then his time in Hell and Purgatory combined. Maybe Sammy was right, he was willing to sacrifice so long as he wasn’t the one being hurt.

Here he was about to do it again, make a deal with the devil in order to save Sammy or was it to protect himself from losing his brother?

It was wrong, but he would rather endure an eternity of torture than hurt Sammy. If he continued on like this, the mark would consume him again. It was just a matter of time. If he lived, he would kill Sam. Just like Cain predicted. 

He had to put his contingency plan into effect. The Hail Mary he had been devising ever since he killed Cain. 

He knew what he had to do. He knew who he had to call. 

\---------------------------------------  
Sam read the tear stained letter again, trying to detect some hidden meaning. 

It had been a month. A month since Death, the horsemen, delivered the letter. Sam never saw this coming. 

He woke up one morning and Dean wasn’t there. Later that day, the day Dean disappeared, Death arrived and explained that Dean had made a deal. Death said Dean had called it a deal, but Sam saw it more as a sacrifice. 

The deal was this: since Dean couldn’t die without turning into a Demon, Death would put him in a place he wouldn’t be able to hurt anyone, a place he could never escape. Sam knew where Dean was even before Death uttered the words. 

He was in the cage. The same cage Sam had shared with Michael and Lucifer. 

Sam wanted to scream, to beg. But he was frozen. Feeling as though he, himself, was back in the cage. 

Sam was about to speak, when Death explained that he granted Dean’s request of exile as he was strangely touched by Dean’s bravery and stupidity. He threw Dean and the first blade (Dean had requested that Death retrieve it from where Cas had hid it) in the cage.

“There is no way of saving Dean. I made sure of that. No deal will undo this.” He took out a letter and handed it to Sam. “He wanted you to have this,” with that Death was gone.

And sure enough, Death had been right. There was no way of undoing this. He would never stop searching but at some point he had to accept the truth, Dean was gone and he was alone, for good this time. 

As he re-read the letter he cursed Dean for giving up. “I would have found a way to save you. You know I would have never stopped trying. Why did you do this to me,” he thought.  
The letter was essentially a suicide note. 

It read:

_Dear Sammy (I know you prefer Sam but you will always be Sammy to me)_

_If you’re reading this, Death kept his promise. You know he is actually an okay guy._

_I know you are probably angry. You have every right to be. But I had to do it. I didn’t tell you before, but Cain told me that I would eventually kill you. That I would then go dark side permanently, with no desire to try and bring you back._

_I couldn’t let that happen, Sammy. I know I’m selfish. But I had to make a decision and I decided to pick the outcome I could live with._

_You were always the strong one. You know how to survive alone, I don’t. I’m not blaming you. I am trying to tell you how proud I am of you. Proud of the person you are and of what we accomplished together._

_Please take this opportunity to start your life over. Get married, have kids and grandkids. But most importantly, look after my baby._

_Tell Cas I’m sorry. He should never give up hope as there will always be a reason to have faith._

_I may not have believed in much but I always had faith in you, Sammy._

_I’ll be seeing you._

_Dean_

Sam put the letter down, wishing that he could undo this nightmare. Then it hit him. He might not be able to bring Dean back, but there may be a way to make things right.

After making some calls, he was ready to take action. He only needed to do one more thing. For this he would need Cas's help.

He prayed to Castiel. He prayed for hours, for days without reply. Then, on the two month anniversary of Dean’s death, Castiel appear in the bunker.

He stood there a moment, just staring at Sam.

“Why are you doing this?” Castiel asked.

“Cause we're brothers, Cas. I can't lose him again. I'd rather be in Hell with him, than spend an eternity alone in Heaven. I know you don't understand but …”

“I think I do Sam,” Cas whispered, interrupting Sam’s plea. If he didn't know better he would have said that Cas was crying. But as far as he knew angels couldn’t cry. Such torture was reserved exclusively for humans.

Cas closed his eyes for a moment and reached in his pocket. “Here is what you asked for,” he said while taking out the rings.

The rings, the key to Lucifer’s cage, were not that hard to find. It took Cas a day to find where Dean had hidden it. He had buried it beneath a tombstone in Kansas after Sam had died. It took Cas a while to decide if he wanted to aid Sam in his suicide mission. In the end, he knew that if the roles were reversed, Dean would have come up with a similar plan. They were family and if that wasn’t a valid reason for self-sacrifice, Cas didn’t know what was.

Cas threw the rings on the ground. Standing motionless, opening his eyes to take in the picture before him. The light from the lamp made the rings shine ominously, hinting at the horrors to come.

“Goodbye and thanks, for everything. You really are family,” Sam said, as he walked towards the rings. He waited until he was close enough to say the incantation.

As the earth parted Sam turned, giving Cas a sad smile. He turned back and readied himself to jump.

As Sam stepped closer to the edge, he started accepting his fate. There would be no more resurrection, no more sacrifices. It didn’t matter what horrors the cage held. This way they would be together, forever. 

“It’ll be ok buddy, I'll never leave you again,” he whispered as he jumped.

That night heaven wept for the two fallen boys. As the dying angel cried, he vowed to continue on the righteous path that Sam and Dean, his only true family, had shown him. He would keep fighting until his grace ran out.

**Author's Note:**

> I can't believe that season 10 is nearly done.  
> I am sure they will end the season in a way that no one saw coming.


End file.
